Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Olde Tyme Familye Scare.

I was getting ready to do a post on vintage costumes and photos, and realized it's been done so many times; just do an image search for vintage hallowe'en photos and you'll have more than you can handle.

I came to the whole blog thing pretty late, I guess.

But in scouring through my collection of vintage photos from books, magazines, the 'Net, and so on, I did find a few that are just... scary.

Not in a 'it's-Hallowe'en-so-it's-supposed-to-be-scary' scary, but in a 'dear-Lord-my-heart!' kinda scary.

I don't think this is actually a vintage photo, but a promotional still from
the hideous mannequin movie Tourist Trap, or possibly one of the
Texas Chainsaw films. Chills.

"What's scary about this?" you ask. Simple. POPEYE.
Popeye is a mumbling, skedaddling, perpetual nightmare and terrifying in any form,
but this deformed version tops them all. The only possible way to make this any more
frightening is if it was actually a girl under there. Don't ask me why, it would just
be scarier. Adding to the scariness, the mask on the Uncle Sam costume makes the
kid look like Jack Soo from Barney Miller.

Oh dear God my eyes... is it a cat or a skunk? More importantly, is it
a man or woman? The hips say 'woman', everything else says 'man',
except for the COSTUME ITSELF! What guy would DO this?
Or am I too hung up on gender role reversal, and not seeing that the real terror
here comes from the creepy masks behind him/her? Lordy LOOK at that pose!
"I didn't know cats could, y'know... do that!"

I'm not sure of the age of this one, but it must be one of the oldest I have found.
It's not overly scary, no, and quite awesome in its vintage feel... until you get
a close-up shot from the same moment:
This is scary. Stunningly, ethereally, mind-bendingly scary.

The only thing scarier has to be this incredible couples costume:
Man! They look just like a youthful Donny and Marie on Hallowe'en night!
Oh wait... never mind.

Seriously, the scariest costume picture in my collection:

Run screaming into the night!

Anyone have any pictures of their own costumes, good or bad, they'd like to share?


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